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Crappy Wedding Pictures...Total Crap.

Maybe it's this time of year and I can mentally hear "Oh my god, (insert man name here)!  Yes I'll marry you!" as women get their new engagement ring for Christmas. So ladies, congratulations and crap....

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The Year I Really Stressed Out on Christmas Eve...

I was in 3rd grade.  There was this new doll out called Baby Holly Hobbie.  She looked nothing like the cloth Holly Hobbie I was used to.  She was what I'd now call the Mack Daddy of Holly Hobbie...

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Look! Samples!

Yesterday I found myself battling grocery store crowds.  The aisles were jammed full of shoppers...half of which would park their grocery cart in the middle of the aisle so they could eat samples.The...

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The day the music died. The party music...

Ever been to a Farrell's Old Fashioned Ice Cream Parlor and Restaurant?  Not to brag, but I have. Several times. The whole theme of the joint is supposed to be 1890's nostalgia.  Harken you back to the...

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It's not a horse...

My dad's company used to sponsor "Family Day" at amusement parks.  I actually think it was the only time my family actually got to go to one of those venues because for the same money, we could spend a...

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Muffin

My family dog's name was Muffin.  She was a cockapoo.  Ever seen one?  She had a fluffy coat...Cream colored.  Yeah...that's her...bottom right.  Sorry for the poor quality shot.  She was active.Muffin...

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I got detention once...

Yeah...I did...8th grade.  "Why?" you ask?  I'll tell you why...My mom decided all her kids were going to start taking Shaklee vitamins.  Ever heard of them?  They were these giant green horse pills....

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How high again?

Dinner at my house growing up usually entailed getting the entire family to sit down together.  It was also, at times, when my parents decided to argue about events from their day.One night my mom and...

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I got nothin' but time lady...

Holy crap.  I just have to share what I just witnessed at my local Post Office. I walk in and there's an older guy waiting and a woman getting waited on by the one employee working the counter.I wound...

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Oh, you shouldn't have. Really...

I happened to be innocently watching the evening news last night when I was visually and mentally accosted by an ad for Vermont Teddy Bears.  I tried to find a video clip but they were all pretty poor...

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Speak a little louder, will you?

Our family's tape recorder was a big hit in our house.  Leave it to yours truly to find a way to use this 1980's technological miracle to torture fellow members of my household.Maybe I'd lay in wait by...

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Be sure to wash your hands.

I'm getting grossed out just looking at this...But can you believe some people don't know what a urinal cake is?  For anyone who doesn't, it's the pink disk...shaped in a little cake.  It does...

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Why, step on up!

One day while walking through a mall in Greeley, CO my mom treated me to an Orange Julius.  I had no idea really what kind of delight I was in for...but man did I quickly become a fan. A big fan....

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Chibi was an a-hole...

He was just awful...a schnauzer.  Next door neighbor of ours owned him.  They'd take a trip to Japan every summer and hired me to watch their wretched dog.An entire month of hell. I couldn't pet Chibi...

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I have no idea where that came from....

Spring.  1991.  My college band director decides it's a fantastic idea for University of Kentucky's entire marching band to sit on stage and bore the audience with all half time show music from our...

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Body Lingo was cool...

1979...My grandmother in Ohio sends me a package for my birthday.  I excitedly opened it and was immediately taken with its contents...Body Lingo Jeans...They are pictured above...Ever heard of the...

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Of course we've been brushing!

1978.  Family trip to Ohio to visit relatives.  We spent two weeks there.  My brothers, sisters and I had a ton of fun.On one of the last days of our visit, my mother comes into my grandparents' living...

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The Time I Won a Cake.

Ever do a cake walk at a carnival?  No?  WHAT?!  Never?!Is it ever your mother loving lucky day.  Because whether you want to hear about it or not, I'm going to share my experience.My elementary school...

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Confession: I loved Garfield

HAHAHA!  Oh my GOD!  Is he a stitch or WHAT?!  I LOVED Garfield! That lazy lasagna loving dog hating cat really tickled my funny bone.  I don't remember when exactly my infatuation with Garfield began....

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Dad's Pants

My dad was never one to let stuff go to waste.  Particularly clothing. Don't get me wrong.  He dressed nice for his job.  Wore a suit.  Perfectly pressed shirt, and conservative tie.  But when the...

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